53 Comments

Great post Paul. Reminds me of a phrase I heard a few years ago: "pain is not the right unit of effort."

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ah that is way more efficient than my 3000 words! haha

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So resonant. It’s an uphill journey in this culture! It helps me to remind myself that intense curiosity brings me balance and productivity, whereas intense effort throws me way off base.

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this is the way!

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provocative post Paul : )

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So agreed Jay. The curiosity quotient is vastly underrated. In fact, curiosity is exactly what makes hard work come naturally and effortlessly. Suddenly one is amazingly productive, not from being pushed forward by the hustle police, but being drawn into action by the joy of discovery.

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curiosity is a reliable path to finding things worth caring about

but it doesn't give you that smooth and up and to the right revenue chart

but way more fun haha

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This is such a great post. I’d fallen into the trap of assuming everything I do had to suck, and it became a self fulfilling prophecy that created nothing but resistance. Even things that were supposed to be enjoyable turned into a slog. But it’s possible to enjoy things AND achieve massive success - if anything, enjoying what you do significantly increases the chances of success.

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I think many people, including myself, have gone through this - very cool to hear that you’ve shifted out of it

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it seems necessary to redefine success in this approach. wondering how you think of it now?

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yeah i do think that if you are solely anchored to extrinsic "proof" of success, you're just setting yourself up for failure

honestly I think one of the best things you can do is find others to befriend who are marching to their own internal compass - basically people like you haha

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As a former member of the hustlerati, the irony is that what they do is easy to them! What would really "suck" (for them) would be to try to do something different:

- working is easy... NOT working is hard

- going to work is easy... coming home is hard

- making money is easy... stopping making money is hard

- providing for their family is easy... staying present and connected with the child right in front of them is hard

(I've felt all of these feelings)

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Yeah I just mostly take issue with how they try to police effort levels. It’s a great strategy for a certain time in life and one where ideally you have the genetic wiring

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Yeah, I’m just suggesting if you talk to him, you should turn his comments against him. You do this re: emotional avoidances.

My point is what “sucks” for him might be sitting with the discomfort of not being productive for a week (or a day), etc.

(which may be the same thing as your emotional avoidances)

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oh yeah for sure - i think this is most humans too haha

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“For you, Sahil, that suck may be 100 hours wasted playing videos games, 100 Doritos, 100 days where you don’t post online (please!).”

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haha be nice!

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This resonates, thanks for sharing.

I have struggled with this for years now, ever since I started my first “corporate” role. Have been grappling with thoughts that Work is simply just Suck and I have to suck it up for the sake of stability and a regular income to fund the good life outside of work. Going back and forth between acceptance and denial.

I appreciate the perspective — now to do the work of integrating it!

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This post is great for people who have a lot of self awareness. They have been through the grind and over the years developed an understanding of their tastes and interests. I suppose a lot of people were upset with your tweet because they know most people don’t have this kind of self awareness. And if they give up on the grind, they can do little else.

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Great newsletter, thanks for sharing this different perspective. The grind culture is easily the “path of least resistance” for most people given the social and work structures which continually encourage this approach. Your viewpoint reminds me of the ideas shared by Robert Fritz on creating new structures that change the “path of least resistance” in your life to create satisfaction and fulfilment and James Currier’s interesting article about network effects and the unseen ways they impact our life and choices https://www.nfx.com/post/your-life-network-effects and while it’s definitely hard to make the change, it can be incredibly rewarding. Keep spreading the awesome message!

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exactly - nowhere have i ever argued its “easier”

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I think the reason it triggers a lot of people is that they've build their identity around success on a specific type of grind / hustle that anything that says it can be otherwise is an existential threat.

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Paul, I'd suggest that your rejection of the Grind presents as a huge threat to the Grinders who want to believe that success is perfectly correlated with effort. If you buy into a philosophy that those who work hardest get the biggest rewards, the individual has full control over their destiny. But then you show up, objectively successful, and shatter the theory into pieces. So where does that leave them? How does the average guy outdo others if he can't just choose to work harder/longer? You are showing them that they don't have full control and I get why they wouldn't like that.

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well many can still dismiss me because over eight years my average earnings are quite, well, average

but yeah I think it does undermine other peoples narratives

I think generally its sort of a weird time for work - you can get rich via minimal effort/luck and that wasn't always true. People don't feel good when this seemingly happens too much, or at least when the suggests is illegible to others

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awesome writing💯💯💯🔥🔥🔥🔥 I can fit in anywhere, but I never do. I always have to just be me and do it my way where there’s balance thank you for the great writing.👏👏👏

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Great post, as always. Thanks Paul!

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I think when it comes to Sahil, there's no real disagreement.

As you, Paul, write as well, arriving to a place where you can do the work you enjoy took a lot of "suck". Emotional suck, but in the end all suck is emotional. Grind is only a grind because thre is resistance. And there will be tons of resistance to overcome (impostor syndrome, various forms of procrastination, etc.). Espcially, if we abstract from work and talk about other life aspects, like health and family life. Approaching that girl for the first time is also a form of "suck".

Another aspect is a paradox, Chris Williamson often mentions. Advice to hustle harder will land with people with high conscientiousness, who are hustling hard anyway. But there are tons of people who should heed that advice but won't. Just sitting on the couch and playing on the x box won't enable anyone to do work they enjoy.

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yeah i think chris is one of the most thoughtful on this topic and someone who has been honest about his own struggles

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I love the cartoon! You should do more!!

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Haha ok. Ai can do words now. But I still had to do a lot of manual edits

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Love this view! Thank you for sharing. Regarding the grinding culture, I'm also concerned about the impact on other people. Are we fostering collaboration and lifting each other up on this path? Building together? I doubt so. Maybe only with people who aspire at the same higher "status" (through power and money), but that won't be genuine, because relationships become transactional. That's why I left my corporate job. I was too sick of the behaviours of many.

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Yup. The transactional stuff is quite empty. Crushed me too

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Have also been thinking of this in relation to being a creator on the internet. The things I don't like: posting every day, posting in real-time, fast jump cuts, tweaking the wording to go viral, growth hacking, 5-day email sequences

But I also think the internet has bifurcated enough (or diversified enough?) that there are many audiences with different preferences. I believe that there's an audience that matches also my preferred cadence, slow cuts, more level-headed wording, email-when-needed. The internet and algorithms make it now possible to just do what feels natural, instead of doing everything for the sake of an ideal optimization

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Spot on. The biggest challenge is if your not doing these things and still anchored to the idea that you want to maximize success and/or growth. It’s just really hard to pull off if not impossible. And so this is where the grinders are right. Their strategies raise the odds of success at mega success. In life however more people trick themselves into thinking they want that than actually want it.

The audience for “I was to maximize success” and push the limits of every aspect of my life > than more balanced approaches. That’s just the reality right now.

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But even given all that, true outlier success almost by definition requires far more creative approaches to life.

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Far more creative and far more authentic! Which is hard to see if we're just following the grind herd mentality.

Totally agree that this requires letting go of some follower count goal / perception of success. I'm very weirdly ok with letting a bit of that go now because it feels less exhausting to not go against the grain

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I think it can be more or less exhausting though. My attitude from the beginning: “how do I not burn out”. My answer was to go slower and follow my curiosity. Over the last 8 years I’ve seen 75%+ stop doing their creative stuff. It’s sort of shocking how many quit. I think you get a lot of survivors that thrive on discipline. And then a lot who end up not actually defining their strategy. I think going “with the grain” can actually be the most exhausting then in the sense you’re just copying people around you (eg “ship every week,” / “gotta use this platform etc”). Generally if you are searching for a unique path you need to experiment with weird and sometimes random strategies that may hve higher odds of succeeding for you.

I actually think you do this well. I’ve never seen someone do that digest / log you did. And then you decided to stop doing it. That meta approach(“try stuff”) will basically win and survive over time.

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Aw thanks Paul. Have been learning to listen to my “nope, not feeling it” gut more, which now that I think about it makes sense to develop because there are 23480 tips out there in the internet but only 1-2 will work for any person

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I believe in “hard” work—but only if it’s an authentic & organic step taken thanks to my curiosity. I learned that, by constantly setting goals, drafting plans, and committing to plenty of different tasks—I temporarily get more “work” done, but it comes at the expense of my soul. I “function” best when hard & deep work are natural consequences of play, genuine curiosity, and leisure.

There are late nights and sacrifices. But maybe we shouldn’t work hard by default.

Appreciate the mention. Great newsletter 👑

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keep me posted if peolpe reach out!

and yeah, i think I got a TON done in my twenties but when I look back I only have money in the bank, no money in my soul lol

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